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Monday, February 27, 2006


Stupidity doesn’t know any limits, does it?

Sometimes solving a problem seems to be a dreadful task but in reality it’s a piece of cake if you look at the right direction. When your mind starts wandering on a problem, it turns into a hell piece of shit that drills your mind thoroughly. Once I am there instead of turning a light I start cursing the darkness in a big way.

Speaking of the right direction,

Once the son asks his father about the difference between boys and girls:

“I couldn’t find any differences.” The son asks.

“Maybe you aren’t looking at the right direction.” My son!

PS: This post was inspired to me after a quarrel on a “problem” with my better half.

Sunday, February 26, 2006

Charshanbe Souri

Charshanbe Souri is around the corner, happy ha? I want to be but I can’t. It seems this nice tradition is distorted because of the lack of cheerfulness.

I was going through the process of teaching the new lesson when I noticed that two of the students entered the class depressed.

“We had to write a “promissory note” to the principal not to bring any sort of firecrackers inside school.”

“All right, go sit down.”

I started once again when I noticed Ali counting some money.

“What on earth are you doing boy?” I called upon him.
He started to shuffle the money in his pocket when he noticed me.

“What money is that?”


“C’mon, how much is it?”

“About 30$.I got all this by selling firecrackers to other students at school.”

While the students’ attention must be directed to studying and so called education, it seems they think about everything BUT education. I know, I know, I know it’s not difficult to point the finger to the wrongdoers;

A nation can’t be a powerful one unless it tries damn hard to be powerful in all walks of life.

A “good” student can’t be a good one unless he/she tries hard to be a good one in all subjects.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Valentine& Teacher’s pet

I know Valentine is behind us now but a couple of days ago something happened that I thought would be nice to be shared:

Sitting on the chair looking at my notebook, I noticed the appearance of one of my best 14 year old students (Ali) in front of me. He left a piece of paper on my desk and came back to his seat.

Here as the paper goes:
“Hold 10 roses in your hands and stand opposite the mirror;
You’ll see 11 roses and among them the most beautiful rose in the world is YOU!” “For teacher”

“Whose poem is it?” I asked.
“I swear to God that it’s my own poem. I have said it for YOUR sake” Ali said politely.
“That’s great. A masterpiece to the core! Way to go!”

One of them smart-aleck students turned to his pal” Boy, have I missed anything? Valentine D. (rooze oshaagh) was a couple of days ago; Ali must have gotten Alzheimer or something who wants to be Mr. Frankie’ pet! By the way, isn’t it a little gay to give a Valentine gift to your MALE teacher?”

I was speechless, that was the first time ever I couldn’t act wittily.

I couldn’t have imagined Valentine has penetrated so much and is celebrated in such remote places where most families are uneducated and not rich. It seems love doesn’t know any boundaries, does it?

Saturday, February 18, 2006


Overheard in the hallway:
“By the way, why shouldn’t WE have the privilege of starting the 3rd world war?” said the man ironically.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006


This Life mirage will come to an end someday,

This is Life.

This is Love.

Death is too.
(A “poem” by Frank)

سراب زندگی پایان پذیرد.

زندگی این است.

عشق این است. مرگ هم نیز.

A nagging better half makes one a “poet& a philosopher.”

PS: This is a joke between us and she doesn’t mind it.

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Raging Bull(s)

Ladies and gentlemen,

Here, you are going to watch the last showdown between THE superpower, heavyweight champion bully boxer &THE light weighted infamous boxer; a boxer who had been ignored for years as a “champ” in the region. Although the superpower has almost won his last fight but, at a price. The superpower hasn’t recuperated it’s last fight. His last opponent had challenged the superpower in a big way.

In an uneven fight the superpower knocked his ass down for goods but, at a price; the bruises are still there illuminating.
The well known Sickurity C. (also known as Sick Authority) is going to judge the game. The light weighted boxer doesn’t believe in the fairness of the referee but whether the boxer has been fair to his “fans” has been called into question itself.

The Ringside physician is absent and only God knows what would happen if any of these two hurt.

There is a commotion among the spectators. They are calling names, throwing things to the “fans” of their opponent. When are the they going to learn how to behave decently? Nobody knows.

The lights turn on. You can see the rivals approaching the ring. They are being advised by THE seconds. (A person aside from the coach who gives a boxer assistance or advice between rounds.)

The superpower yells snobbishly challenging the other boxer with “I get ya in the ring, I'll give ya a fuckin' beatin', ya don fuck with me.I'm da boss, I'm da boss, I'm da boss, I'm da boss, I'm da boss... I'm da boss, I'm da boss, I'm da boss, I'm da boss, I'm da boss, I'm da boss.”
The superpower is ignoring the fact that the light weighted boxer knows some Rabbit Punches (An illegal punch to the back of the boxer¹s head or body usually kidneys in that case)
The light weighted boxer knows that this is a no-win situation but,” what the fuck when the spectators have paid the price.” THE light weighted boxer thinks to himself.

Friday, February 10, 2006

Slow Dance

I wish there was a way to help our cancer stricken people in OUR country just by clicking and sending the same forms to our friends. I wish HELP were a CLICK away!

This poem was written by a terminally ill young girl in a New York
Hospital. It was sent by a medical doctor - Make sure to read what is in the closing statement AFTER THE POEM. SLOW DANCE

Have you ever watched kids On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rainSlapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down.Don't dance so fast. Time is short.The music won't last.

Do you run through each dayOn the fly?When you ask How are you?
Do you hear the reply?When the day is doneDo you lie in your bed With the next hundred choresRunning through your head?You'd better slow downDon't dance so fast.Time is short.The music won't last.

Ever told your child,We'll do it tomorrow?And in your haste, Not see his sorrow?Ever lost touch,Let a good friendship die Cause you never had timeTo call and say,"Hi"You'd better slow down . Don't dance so fast.Time is short. The music won't Last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere You miss half the fun of getting there.

When you worry and hurry through your day, It is like an unopened gift....Thrown away.

Life is not a race.Do take it slowerHear the musicbefore the song is over.


Dear All: PLEASE pass this mail on to everyone you know - even to those you don't know! It is the request of a special girl whowill soon leave this world due to cancer.This young girl has 6 months left to live, and as her dying wish, she wanted to send a letter telling everyone to live their life to the fullest, since she never will. She'll never make it to prom, graduate from high school, or get married and have a family of her own. By you sending this to as many people as possible,you can give her
And her family a little hope, because with every name that this is sent to,The American Cancer Societywill donate 3 cents per name to her treatment and recovery plan. One guy sent this to 500 people! So I know that we canat least send it to 5 or 6 --- (just think, it could be you one day). It's not even your money, just your time!PLEASE PASS ON AS A LAST REQUEST Dr. Dennis Shields, Professor Department of Developmental and Molecular Biology
1300 Morris Park Avenue Bronx, New York 10461

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Why Should Women Work?

My students aren’t aware of the fact that I “misuse” their emails not only as a class paper but also as a way to give my readers an insight on how an average Iranian man or woman think and live. I have left the emails unedited because I think they needed to remain intact in order to secure the essence of the message:

Mina (Female about 21)

I think that's clear! When a woman has knowledge and ability of doing something and when she can do this work in a best way, why she doesn't do? Women before their gender are human and they absolutely are free to choose their favorites things.
Some men believe that the atmosphere of Job's environment isn't good for women but I think these are us that make this atmosphere. We must learn that we should work with each other without make any problem for each other.
Women try to go to the university and try to learn things and they want to help to society with their jobs. Why they should stand at home when they know all the thing of doing something?
Some men believe that if a woman works, she can't do house chores very well and this is possible when he goes home, he hasn't dinner!!! But I think we should learn that woman didn't come for give us service. They just get married for beginning a life with her husbands that in this life both of them should try to make a good life, good family, good children, and in this life both of them should be relax. So women aren't servants!
I think the society is the same as family; men and women should work with each other and create a good society. Finally when can stop men's working, we can think about stop women!

Mona (Female_22)

There are three main reasons why women work .The first one is there are some jobs which need more attention and delicacy by women. Women are more patient and precise. They have more patience. They can do these jobs better than men, for example sewing, food dressing although some men do these jobs as well. And in other hand there are some jobs that need to strong power that woman can't do them. The second reason is financial Independence. Women think they should depend on men and they can't do everything along. When women work, they earn money so they can become financially independent and they gain self-confidence. Also I think this reason is for when they don't get married. The third reason is life’s situation. Nowadays women need to work to earn money for their lives as men do .Expenditure is high and both men and women for spending their lives need to work. Totally I agree with women's working. But when they have child its better them not to work and take care from their children till their children grow up and become older because children need to their mother's love more than money. When women are in home there are special peace and safety for their husband and children.

Maria (Female 23)

In my idea if every person has an expert knowledge he or she should use from his or her skill. It's no difference between men or women! Especially nowadays that everything is expensive and life is being very hard, both of men and women should work.
Some girls are very anxious for going to the university and they study very hard until they accept in the university. Then they accept in university their parents spend a lot of money for them and they take trouble too, then when they get married their husbands don't allow them to work. In my opinion it's absolutely trouble! Spending a lot of money, pass out time… all of these are wink.
Furthermore experience shows that every woman should has financial independence, because if in the feature she has problem with her husband that result in divorced she can secure herself. It has not any reason that women shouldn't work!

Sara (Female 22)

I think a woman must work. Women can show all of their ability when they work, but if stay at home the limit in cooking, washing, etc. Maybe there be women who do not work and are fain and successful, but were always they happy?
A woman is a social virtual like men and it's necessary that woman be in society. There are some jobs that women can do them better or women are more successful than men such as teacher, nurse. One of reason for women that they want to work is financial independence , it is very bad when a woman need to money or other things she should request of men then if men like are helping her if not ... she does not have any way for her problem. However women work and they receive salary and it help to family. Nowadays when men get married they promise to their wife that do not prevent about work and continue education at all , but after a short period they forget all promises and do not allow women work they afraid of women position in society because we can see women try to do all job without mistake because they do not want to be any excuse .But this depend to selves that want to work or not ( e.g. one of my friend believe it is not important that a woman can work after graduated .) it is good people continue education for knowledge but if can use their study at work and life it is better.

Monday, February 06, 2006

Animal Farm

I have to say that the word revolution really and frankly makes me sick. Have I ever told you that I hate the alphabet R the most?The reason is the story of animal farm by George Orwell.

Radical,uproot,reveloution,eradicate,obliterate have R in them.

It seems that THE never ending fire among nations will never stop extinguishing.

Friday, February 03, 2006

The Paranoid Teacher

You name it .all kinds of sexual connotations are used in some of my classes as the “need” arises and urges the teacher to do so as a classroom “technique” to cool things off. When something as simple as hitting a ball to the classroom window happens, the class tends to go nefarious on making norch_norch sounds all the way to get a laugh out of nothing while at the same time drive their teacher nuts.
The teacher was correctly diagnosed having a “moderate” paranoia according to
Here is a teacher who becomes hyperalert to the student’s moves; a teacher who can’t help but use some indirect sexual connotation(s) to pretend that he is neither angry nor minds an off color joke and yeah! He appreciates and enjoys it too; A teacher who is carefree about the verbal hygiene in his classroom.
Upon hearing norch norch sound once I said” Are you enjoying flossing the last pieces of meat (read something else) in your mouth?”

Did they stop laughing for moments? “Of course nope.”

They somehow liked the joke and the proof is that they were laughing wholeheartedly with their faces that had turned red; and the class went on more smoothly than before. My colleagues warn me not to go sexual in case like that.What the hell when it works.ha?

“Didn’t I change your seat to stop you chatting with your pals?”

“But,mista! It ain’t my fault! HE (his buddy) is the one who is letting me in chatting.”

“Do you always give green lights to others when you are asked to?”
“Did I mean anything gayish?”
I might so!

The class was bursting in laugh for moments…